So I've been nominated to chair my favorite meeting here in Chicago - starting tomorrow. I have to admit - when I was picked to do this, my first thought was that I really didn't want to. I've never really gotten comfortable in the program in Chicago. I just don't feel that comfortable talking or sharing. I do it very infrequently. People know very little about me - they know that I moved on my 4 month anniversary and survived breast cancer. People tell me I should be talking, sharing my story, but I just show up and sit there quietly. Well, not anymore.
Anyway, to chair this meeting, I have to pick readings and then give a lead on them. The day after I was picked to do this, a friend called and asked me to speak at the really big open meeting in my home town. Again, I didn't want to do this either. Me, speak in front of 250 people? Anyone who knows me knows this is a virtual impossibility. But, it isn't until mid March - so for now, I'll just worry about tomorrow. Below I've pasted the readings that I have selected for tomorrow. The theme of the meeting is change.
“I have more peace and contentment. Life has fallen into place. The pieces of the jigsaw puzzle have found their correct position. Life is whole, all of one piece. I am not cast hither and yon on every wind of circumstance or fancy. I am no longer a dry leaf cast up and away by the breeze. I have found my place of rest, my place where I belong. I am content. I do not vainly wish for things I cannot have. I have the “serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” Have I found contentment in A.A.?"
October 31, Twenty-Four Hours A Day
“If you can take your troubles as they come, if you can maintain your calm and composure amid pressing duties and unending engagements, if you can rise above the distressing and disturbing circumstances in which you are set down, you have discovered a priceless secret of daily living. Even if you are forced to go through life weighed down by some inescapable misfortune or handicap and yet live each day as it comes with poise and peace of mind, you have succeeded where most people have failed. You have wrought a greater achievement than a person who rules a nation. Have I achieved poise and peace of mind?”
June 27, Twenty-Four Hours A Day
“[Fifth,] I have learned to live one day at a time. I have finally realized the great fact that all I have is now. This sweeps away all vain regret and makes my thoughts of the future free of fear. Now is mine. I can do what I want with it. I own it, for better or worse. What I do now, in this present moment, is what makes up my life. My whole life is only a succession of nows. I will take this moment, which has been given to me by the grace of God, and I will do something with it. What I do with each now will make or break me. Am I living in the now?”
October 25, Twenty-Four Hours A Day
“Our job is to be ready and willing for these experiences, find incentive in the examples of fellow members who are living the AA program, be open-minded in our endeavor to understand God and realize that it is not made up of one big accomplishment but gained bit by bit, and remember our inspiration will be influenced by our attitude and action.”
From The Little Red Book, Step 3, page 42.
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