A turn for the boring...

Well, it seems my life has taken a shift. One that feels dramatic actually, although I am sure that is a matter of perception like most things are. Sorry I haven't posted in a week - I see that people have been checking. I haven't had anything to post about. Nothing that seems interesting anyway. In fact, my head feels so much less cluttered these days, that I don't feel the need to sit down and dump out its contents either here or in email really.

The only thing I can really say is everything is good. Work is extremely busy but I am managing it pretty well, my health is fine as I reported last post, I could use a meeting, I'm glad it's Friday and hopefully I can get away with not working this weekend. I attribute this lack of anything chaotic to vent about to the fact that I started taking Lexapro and I think it's working already. It's hard to describe, but the things that normally make my head explode, make me do strange OCD behaviors and other sorts of anxiety related things, just aren't bothering me. I just don't feel bothered. Of course these things are still there, but I just don't feel bothered by them at the moment, at all really.

It is easier to breathe, it is easier to relax. Only thing is - now that I don't have all that junk taking up the space in my head and all the time that I used to spend worrying about it is suddenly free, I'm not sure what to do. My life has taken a definite turn for the boring. Which is good on the one hand and definitely what I wanted - I wanted a boring year after everything I went through last year. I am not used to boring though. I am not used to lack of chaos and drama. I am not used to feeling like I have no problems and no complaints.

Anyway, my sponsor, who I am pissed at at the moment, tells me I have to start writing daily gratitude lists. Maybe I'll post them here along with my regular posts or something. So,

I'm grateful: that my office overlooks lake Michigan, that the sun is shining, that it's Friday, that I love my job (most days), that I have nothing to worry about, that I will get to leave on time, that I have bubble bath at home, that my period started right on time (sorry folks, but this is a big deal because of my fertility worries from taking chemo drugs), that I feel better. I guess that is enough for today.